I didn't even blink when my son was given his diagnosis of PDD-NOS. I didn't need the neurologist to tell me what my soul already knew. But lets get one thing straight just because I didn't break down doesn't mean I didn't and don't have my moments of feeling sorry for myself. Yes, myself, not him he is a happy little boy. He was given the diagnosis at 18 months old so it has been about three years now. I recently stopped to think about how our lives have changed since then and the truth is, it has. I didn't realize the impact it had on our family as a whole. I knew my daughter was affected by it. I could see her face change every time she watched as one therapist entered our house and the other one left. I watched as the jealousy would sometimes consume her. She was only 2 and a half when he was diagnosed and he was already receiving Early Intervention therapy since he was nine months old. My little girl dealt with a lot at a very young age. She had to quickly learn that sometimes her needs came second. It breaks my heart to admit that out loud but it is the truth. It wasn't fair for her or us but as someone recently shared with me "fair is when everyone gets what they need." I would often wish I could replicate myself so I could give them both equal attention. It may sound silly but having to put my son needs first in many situations was necessary but came with consequences. Some of the consequences were good others not so much but such is life.
In reflection of the past three years I have learned that my family is pretty amazing. We were given these two beautiful children. The first has had something important to say since the day she was born. The second has special needs and taught us more about life than any other peron we know. We would move heaven and earth to help them. We came together as a family and sometimes had massive melt downs but always came out of them shining. I recently remembered a day a few years back when I was feeling sorry for myself "Why is this happening to us" I asked my husband. His answer was so profound and matter of fact that it is has gotten me through many difficult moments. He said "God knew you would be able to see it and help him early on". When the words came out of his mouth tears rolled down my face. His words had such a powerful meaning to them. It resonated in my soul and I knew what he said was true.
Today, we have great days and some not so great moments. My daughter has come a long way and is coming to understand that her brother's brain just works differently than mine and yours. She is such an amazing little person and get ready world because she going to be someone you will want to listen to. My husband has always been our rock of support. He is not a man of many words but a man of just the right ones at the right time. My son has made such great progress and continues to bring joy to us all. As for me, I am the glue that holds this wonderfully not perfect family together. May God shine his light and guide all of our paths on this journey we call Life!!
In reflection of the past three years I have learned that my family is pretty amazing. We were given these two beautiful children. The first has had something important to say since the day she was born. The second has special needs and taught us more about life than any other peron we know. We would move heaven and earth to help them. We came together as a family and sometimes had massive melt downs but always came out of them shining. I recently remembered a day a few years back when I was feeling sorry for myself "Why is this happening to us" I asked my husband. His answer was so profound and matter of fact that it is has gotten me through many difficult moments. He said "God knew you would be able to see it and help him early on". When the words came out of his mouth tears rolled down my face. His words had such a powerful meaning to them. It resonated in my soul and I knew what he said was true.
Today, we have great days and some not so great moments. My daughter has come a long way and is coming to understand that her brother's brain just works differently than mine and yours. She is such an amazing little person and get ready world because she going to be someone you will want to listen to. My husband has always been our rock of support. He is not a man of many words but a man of just the right ones at the right time. My son has made such great progress and continues to bring joy to us all. As for me, I am the glue that holds this wonderfully not perfect family together. May God shine his light and guide all of our paths on this journey we call Life!!
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